Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Spiritual Reatlessness

He does this routine everyday, except of course when it is raining. He is a wasp and he has been trying to build something (a nest?) in my wind chimes. The chimes are hollow tubes of metal with a pleasant blue and silver design on them. The wasp keeps bringing strips of dead weeds, as much as he can carry, to the chimes. He takes his cargo into hollow center of any of the metal tubes, places it there and leaves to go get another strip of dead weed. While he is gone, the weed he left behind falls out the bottom, slowly and steadily. By the time the wasp returns, it is gone. This does not dissuade the wasp. He keeps flying back and forth with more and more dead weeds. I am the one that has to get rid of the pile (a very small pile) that lies on the deck below the chimes each morning. The wasp is not consistent in which metal tube he flies into, usually choosing one seemingly at random out of the six that are present. Occasionally the wasp comes back with no weeds and goes into a tube to inspect his work. It is then that he re-emerges distraught because there is nothing to show for his effort. He flies away angry but usually comes back carrying a dead weed.

I am feeling a restlessness right now, a spiritual restlessness, which causes me to wonder if anything I am doing has any meaning. Am I, like my friend the wasp, going about my day, doing what I think is important without a clue. Am I as unaware as the wasp ? When I do notice that nothing has been built, am I the same as the wasp ? Do I just go back and do the same things again, even though I notice nothing is getting done ?

I don't have any answers. I keep looking at the wasp hoping he might give me a clue but I don't have one yet.


Lin said...

Sometimes there are subtle things going on that aren't quite apparent to the eye. We must continue on, with the goal in our minds, eye on the prize. Don't stop to see where you have been, keep moving forward. When you get there you can look back, but until then, let it build behind you. You will be pleasantly surprised the mountain you have climbed without knowing it.

There might be something in that tube, and maybe he is just checking to see if it remains--you know, for comfort. There must be something or he wouldn't keep coming back. I like his little positive attitude anyway. I think of Dori from "Finding Nemo". She sings "Just keep on swimming, swimming, swimming...."

butterfly woman said...

I like this story kind of a fable/parable. Like your tea story you wrote a while back. Writings with a subtle lesson.A lesson for you this time. Hope you continue with this style. I enjoy how you tie in nature with your own inner evolution. I've been watching the wasp as well but not as closely as you, didn't realize dead weed falling out. I was more worried his little ears would be blasted by the chime sounds. Perhaps he is just enjoying the music, nothing else. I admire his fortitude, perhaps rather than looking at task completed, he is just staying in the moment. I took a photo of wasp on top of chime, maybe you could use it.

Soulsearcher said...

I think you are right where you should be because you are aware of what is happening or not happening (seemingly not happening) in your life. Very good! Sometimes life feels like a test--can we withstand the constant drudgery of each day? But, when we stay aware and commmit ourselves to keep moving forward, things happen. Like Bev, I enjoy this style of writing and I hope you will continue with it.

About Me

I am a crabby old man who hates everything
I am a tiny wonderer in a large world
I am a young hippie tree-hugger
I am a mid-life crisis disaster area.
I am an attitude of stillness waiting for a wind.
I have not decided yet.